i’ve decided to continue introducing my books here on a monthly basis! next up, we’re starting from the beginning with my debut chapbook, preparatory school for the end of the world.
i started writing for this book (without realizing it) when i was released from an outpatient psychiatric program in 2021. at the time, i was processing a good deal of repressed abuse trauma, as well as actively questioning my gender and starting to live as an openly trans person. it got me thinking about how my past had affected my sense of gender identity, and i went back to an idea i’d had a while back: a funeral ceremony for my past identity. the chapbook-writing process flowed steadily after that; i did research into death ritual and used the results to explore gender, ego death, rebirth, and trauma through poetry. the result is an act of letting go: poems in an experimental call-and-response format form a series of sacred conversations between internal and external, shedding the mentalities that no longer serve me.
praise
Self-exploration in a hellish landscape, ‘preparatory school for the end of the world’ by nat raum pulls imagery and moods from an apocalypse, Victorian paintings, Dante’s Inferno, perfume commercials, Disasterpiece’s soundtrack for It Follows, and more to commemorate the death of adolescence. Like an indie title at a film festival, raum’s poetry focuses on dissociation as a setting—not just a state of being—and how that interplays with the deconstruction and reconstruction of the self. what makes this chapbook a classic is how it has a signature style to it, which we haven’t seen since Richard Siken’s Crush.
—tommy blake, author of Trick Mirror or Your Computer Screen
‘preparatory school for the end of the world’ is an outstanding collection of experimental poems by nat raum. Reading nat’s book was a really haunting experience conjuring memories of my religious upbringing with teachings and sermons. Themes of self-hatred and inadequacy are all too familiar; “the buried mass of tequila and pinched nerves and matte liquid lipstick for whom the deid bells toll,” nat writes. This collection pokes “holier than thou” in the eye, reminding us all that the world is dangerous and violent, even among those who claim to be the most holy and good. Life is sometimes messy, horrible, and disturbing, as nat reminds us all. “in sickness in health and in violence.” Confessional, dark, and beautiful, nat’s poetry demands your attention and reverence. I love this book so much.
—Aura Martin, author of Butterflies Over Flame
In their deeply visceral, punk-as-all-hell ‘preparatory school for the end of the world,’ nat raum makes a pledge not to the confines of institutionalized religion, but rather to themselves and the various demons of human existence that famously exceed the narratives of a Christian god. This collection not only comes at a time when personal spiritualism feels more vital than ever, but it also serves as a much-needed queering of the heteronormative structures which relentlessly torment us all. Through a delicate balance of the realistic and the pataphysical in an immaculate manner that dismisses neither, raum’s poems pack so much grit that the reader can actually feel each one grinding against their mortal flesh. Moreover, there’s something for everyone. Those looking to explore an edgy, tender, unapologetic system of personal longing will find plenty to discover in this collection of poems. Those seeking raw lyricism that is humble without succumbing to hesitation will as well. raum’s ‘preparatory school for the end of the world’ is the perfect crossover between punchy poetics as we’ve come to know them, and the contemporary, hard-hitting nature of innovative, groundbreaking, contemporary poets such as Chelsey Minnis. It serves as a prayer, or else a plea, to and of the self, as well as a fearless image/text exploration of better possibilities.
An exorcism all its own, ‘preparatory school for the end of the world’ exists in a time and space unique to raum that we, as readers, are extremely blessed to experience through the poems in this fabulously experimental collection.
—Ami J. Sanghvi, author, artist, co-EIC of Gutslut Press
press
selected works
you can find selected pieces from this book published in the following places:
“bloody mary” in warning lines magazine, volume 3: fall’n cherub — Nominated for Sundress Publications’ Best of the Net Anthology 2022
“the exorcism of nat raum” in Midnight Mass Anthology edited by tommy blake & Charlie D’Aniello
“rosewood lane” in Sledgehammer Lit (includes audio)
“odd fellows cemetery” and “requiem aeternam” in Eclipse Zine, Issue 2: Dépaysement
“perideipnon" and "scenes from a marriage" in Death's Dormant Daughter, Queer Views: From the Other Side anthology
“he never married,” “odd fellows cemetery,” “perideipnon,” and “thoracic vertebrae” in Corporeal Lit (includes audio)
preparatory school for the end of the world can be purchased in print through my webstore or downloaded as a free PDF on my itch.io page.